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Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Finding Balance

This is a topic for someone like me.  Balance is everything to me.  In my life, I need busy days, quiet days, happy days, melancholy days.  I need people of all types around me.  I like chatty people, subdued people, smart people, good listeners, helpful people and just about any other type of person you can label.  What I don't need and don't want, because it upsets my balance, is stupid people and heartbreak.  That is not to say that I don't have them, it is to say that I don't really want them.  I suppose because they exist I am probably better able to appreciate all the other people and things with which I am blessed.  You know, into each life a little rain must fall.  I never promised you a rose garden.  You can't have a rainbow without a little rain. That sort of thing.

I need to eat a fairly balanced diet.  My idea of fairly balanced means that twice a day (usually, sometimes only one meal is enough) I will eat some protein and I will eat vegetables and a couple of times a week I will eat some fruit.  I have milk nearly everyday and cheese, oh yes, cheese every single day.  I must have my 'goodie' every other day, at the very least.  Okay, so balanced. when associated with diet, for me means I will control my portion sizes, I will never control my actual food choices.  I will eat what I am hungry for and not over eat hardly ever.  

My marriage is also a balancing act.  I cannot keep my mouth shut all the time, so I settle for not saying something EVERY time I really want to correct him or nag suggest he actually strike something off his 'to do' list.  I really can't change who he is, though I have seriously tried for nearly 30 years, but I can try to help him grow into a more productive and neater partner.  Yeah, that's what I am good at, the helping him grow part.  He agrees, I am quite sure. Regardless, we have found balance in that we talk about important things and come to an agreement, usually whatever I want and if it's a financial decision, when I determine that we can afford it.  That part works and he is free with his input and honestly seldom disagrees.  Therefore, when he does disagree, I usually go with his desires.  We are usually on the same page. I think we are pretty well balanced in all aspects of our married life.  He isn't like me at all.  We could probably not be more different.  I am a talker and a writer and a reader and a computer nerd.  He watches TV and works and mows lawn and putters outside and listens.  He is an early riser and talks as he's drinking his first cup of coffee, if someone is around with whom he can talk, one of the dogs will do.  I am a night owl and late riser who enjoys quiet during my first cup of coffee.  He loves all sports from his recliner on his big screen and he loves my cooking.  I love to cook and eat. We both love summer and anything that involves the deck and/or the pool.  We both love having parties in the summer. 

It works.

The one place I do not have balance is in my love of writing.  If I start a book, I will obsess until it is completed. I sometimes stay up all night and take a nap and then go right back to the story. I basically do nothing else until it is done.  I will write and rewrite until it is in the roughest form finished.  I will work it over until I am happy with it, set it aside and like most, go back to it in a couple of weeks and rework it again.  Then I like to give it to my sister for editing.  Then rework again.  I cannot leave a book unfinished.  I want to sometimes.  I want to start something else, sometimes; but I cannot.

All things considered, I think my life is pretty much centered.  The good and the not so good are in balance.  The people around me are so varied that I am never bored with their company.  My kids are all grown and living their own lives which all include me to some degree.  (Some more than others)  My grandbabies are all healthy and happy and I LOVE spending time with each of them.  
I think I am just plain happy.  

Yep, I am.



  1. It sounds like you have figured out what works good for you! Great blog!


  2. It sounds like a very well balanced life Jo! I think that Grandkids tip the scale toward the 'Happy' side way more than one might expect, considering their size!

  3. Kathy...I am always trying to figure out what works for me! lol It's an on-going process.
    Thank you so much for stopping and commenting.

    Mike...It sounds that way and most of the time it is that way. The Grandkids are definitely the sugar in the cookie of my life. All 7+1/2 of them! Thx for commenting, you know I love that.

  4. HEHE yes i've mISSED YOU!

    umm...s "stupid people and heartbreak" wow..ive been that for a long heart was broke and i became stupid..and ATE WRONG TOTALLY WRONG..yet thought i was eating right..duh..see!! hehe

    m u a h

  5. Brenda...I so missed YOU! Your balance might just be eating all the wrong stuff and believing it's the right stuff! he he he Who am I to judge? We did that one already...I don't judge! So glad you stopped by and shared and so glad you're back! MMMwwwwaaaaa <3

  6. Great post Jo!! I can relate to the balance in marriage thing--my husband and I totally balance each other out. I'm working on the rest of me. Balancing the diet, balancing my time, balancing my finances... Sometimes the balance is there--and sometimes not--but it all balances out in the end. I enjoyed reading this post :) Cheers, Jenn

  7. Nice. The 'right' balance is different for different people. It sounds like you've found what works for you, your marriage, and your life, and that's a beautiful thing. I like happy. Happy is good. :O)

  8. Jenn...Thank you for stopping in, reading and commenting! That makes me happy and balances me! I know that balance in all things is always a temporary thing and everyone kinda works on that continually. It's a goal rather than a task.

  9. Beth...I like happy, too. I can't really LIVE in happy, things happen, but it's a goal! I agree the right balance is very individual and we all work toward figuring out what is right for right now. That's as good as it gets, I think.
    Thanks for reading and sharing...THAT MAKES ME HAPPY!

  10. Wonderful post. I am just plain happy too, for many of the same reasons. I'm always working on that balance part, though.

  11. Langley...aren't we all? Thanks again for stopping by and sharing.

  12. It sounds like you are an organized person. As for the writing, at least you're doing it! So many people come across misbalance in that they don't work on the writing.


  13. Joyce...I don't think everyone needs to write daily or with any regularity. I think I need to do that because it clears my head. It is my therapy. Everyone has their own way to find balance.


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