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Sunday, September 30, 2012

THE VISIT




POV…1st person

I have to visit my friend. Yes, have to. I wanted to visit yesterday and catch up and laugh with him and do what we always do. I wanted to have a nice lunch and then lounge at the restaurant with a cup of coffee and remember fun times or discuss what each of us is currently writing or maybe even talk about his successful novel. I loved to hear how excited he was to finish the final edit. How he told the publisher that he had just written the best book they would ever peruse and possibly the best book ever written. He was sure his bullshit was what made them read his sample.

Instead, I am visiting my friend at the funeral home. As I enter, I see smiling faces and groups of people, some I know, some I do not. His children are near the entrance so I walk directly to them. I really want to speak, but I have no words. I hug each of them and walk to the casket. I pray and I make him a promise. The pain in my heart is unbearable and I need to go. The lightness in this room in inappropriate for my state of loss.

Alone, walking to the car I keep myself together. Once inside, the dam breaks and I am engulfed in my grief and holding my own face with a tissue covering my hands, I simply weep. The drive home is lonely and I remember so much. I am grateful he is not in pain and not lingering on life support.

His time is up and he is heading to his reward. Based on my feelings for him and my knowledge of his life, he is going to be very pleased with his eternity. He deserves all the goodness heaven can offer. He was a good friend and my writing for publication is all because he told me that I was good enough. I believed him. I miss him.

POV…3rd person

It’s over. His pain is gone and she can say goodbye with a heavy heart. Jo had anticipated a much longer time with her friend, but the Lord had other plans. Ed’s failing heart had simply worn out. He had been called home and all that remained for Jo was to pay her respects and then figure out how to be a writer without her muse. She headed for the funeral home alone.

Walking into the funeral parlor she was overcome by the number of people who seemed not to be heart-broken. They were smiling and shaking hands. She was not ready for this she wasn’t ready to lose him and everyone seemed to have let him go. Didn’t they know what she knew? Didn’t they know she needed him in her life? Didn’t they care?

She wasn’t able to smile at his children. She hugged them and said nothing. She prayed for his soul, though she knew he was already home.

The tears on her cheeks were for her loss, not his. She lowered her head, signed the guest book and walked alone back to her car. Once inside, she let the tears and the heartbreak take over. She completely broke down and gave in to the grief that would be with her for some time.

Her friend, her mentor and her muse had left her to carry on without his constant support and encouragement. He left her with the confidence to continue and she left his lifeless body with a promise to honor him by never forgetting that she was good enough.

Jo

24 comments:

  1. oH WOW 3rd person..makes me weep..(totally confused by this weeks topic..and this sort of helps) but so so sad!! *is it true?

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  3. I found first person more powerful and poignant. I'm sure Ed would be pleased that you've written about him.

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    1. Thank you. I have written about him a couple of other times. He was instrumental in getting me to get serious about writing. He helped me write my first two books, I mean he encouraged and pushed and read pieces and parts and gave me advice. I really miss him.

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    2. (((((((((( hugs )))))))))) this tears me up even more now

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  4. Jo, what a beautiful story. I am so sorry for your loss, whenever it was. Like Brenda, I was a little uncertain how to approach this topic. Guess I will try to give it a shot but it won't come close to being as good as yours.

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    1. KAT, it was 4 years ago come February that Ed passed after a very brief hospital stay.

      Thank you and I'm glad I helped you understand. First person is you telling your story to me. Third person could be me telling your story to someone else.

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  5. I am so sorry for your loss. Beautiful job on the writing.

    Kathy
    http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you, Kathy. He was very special.

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  6. I've always felt like first person brings us closer to the MC and makes for a more personal piece; however, I see your third person as stronger. It gives me a good view of the entire picture. Well done. I was hoping this was a fiction story, but I see from the comments that it's not. So sorry about your loss. Time helps, but certainly doesn't fix everything.

    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you, Joyce. I felt and I usually feel when I write in 3rd person it is better and more complete. I believe it has something to do with standing back and seeing the big picture. First person, I am maybe too involved. I don't know.

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  7. This happens most with the people we care for

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  8. I realize from the comments that it's about your friend and your feelings on his passing. Thank you for sharing. I so sorry for your loss. I'm sure he's so proud of you. What a fantastic job you did of this, Jo.

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    1. I often think of him and wonder if he would enjoy reading these blogs. Thank you Corinne.

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  9. Amy Morgan left a very nice comment which has disappeared...it was in my spam folder and is now in cyberspace, apparently. It read:
    Jo, It's so hard to lose someone who has such an impact on such a personal part of our lives and I feel for your loss. You've done Ed proud in both pieces and in writing this to lift up the special place he had in your life and your writing. On the technical prompt side, I too find the 3rd person more gripping. I'm sure his memory gives you a measure of peace when remembering him.

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    1. I had to display this Amy, it is a lovely comment and I wanted to respond. He is always in my mind and I can't write much of anything without thinking of something that he said to me or a story that he told me.

      I do miss him, but mostly, I am so happy that I had him in my life at exactly the time I did. We met over 30 years ago and then hadn't seen or spoken to each other until just 18 months before he passed. In that 18 months we became very close and shared a great deal.

      I found it difficult to write the first person part, taking myself to that room and those other people, but the 3rd person removes me and allows me to tell the story.

      Thank you so much for your carefully crafted comment. ♥

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  10. Both are great, I tend to be a 3rd person fan myself as I was with this. *hugs*

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  11. This is lovely, Jo. Thanks for sharing it. It must be interesting to write about oneself in 3rd person and the result was excellent and piercing.

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    1. Thank you so much. It is different to step outside and watch an event from your life through a narrator 's eyes.

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