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Thursday, July 18, 2013

WRONG WAY GO BACK

Lately it seems every where I look, I see women talking about their bodies. They are aging and it sucks. They aren't smooth and soft and that sucks. The bulges are not easily hidden in clothes anymore and that sucks. Their faces aren't perfect and that sucks. Ankles or tankles? and that sucks. You name the body part and someone doesn't like the one they have. *sigh*

I'm so sorry that we have created this in our lives. Yes, WE have created it. We judge our own bodies by photos that have been airbrushed, by models who barely eat and by ridiculous standards. We want it all and we want to be perfect. We want to be pretty and thin and sexy and we never feel like we are. *sigh*

Women are entirely too demanding and entirely too fixated on looks. We get what our genes gave us. Learn to live with it. Sure, you can watch your diet and eat healthy foods. You can take care of yourself, and you should, but you will never be perfect and even if you are, you'll never believe you are because we have created a world where any tiny conceived flaw is disastrous. Beauty is so multidimensional. There are millions of kinds of beauty. All of them begin with a beautiful heart. If you are not a good person inside, your outer looks will never maintain beauty. Those in your life will see the mask, but they will also see the lack of warmth or honesty or selflessness and those are not pretty.

I'd like to purpose that we all take a new and different look at our bodies.

I'll start and then maybe you could do the same or share this with someone who needs to reevaluate her own body image.

 1)I have ears that don't hear as well as they once did, but they still hear someone say they love me.

 2)I have eyes that require glasses, but they still see the beauty of my children and their children and the man who shares my life. They still see my Momma smile when I open her door.

 3)My hair is good but graying and it no longer cares how I want to wear it; it decides daily where to go and where to curl, but it covers my head and a lot of my face.

 4)My arms are wiggly and hang like turkey necks, but they still hug and hold loved ones. They still direct my hands on the keyboard and those old and veined hands still work very well.

 5)My boobs are no longer any where near where they used to be, but they hold my shirts out and give me some semblance of femininity. They may be at my waist when I am braless, but they can still be corralled into a well fitted bra for public display and I still have 2 of them. Many don't.

 6)My belly isn't flat anymore, but my butt is. Two babies grew in there and I've not really had a flat tummy since that, but I sure wouldn't trade either of them for a rock hard gut at 62.

 7)As wiggly as my upper arms are, my thighs are much worse. Once muscled and hard from running, now just jiggly and dimpled and fat.Without them, I wouldn't be as tall as I am.  They do a fine job of supporting me as I make my way through each day and they seldom give me any pain. They work.

 8)My knees have always been a bit weak since high school hurdles tackled me, but they still bend and they still allow me to walk unencumbered. They are a little pudgy now, but capri pants cover them nicely!

 9)Calfs...they're okay for an old gal. (My grandma had great legs her whole 85 years, she told us so often.)

10)Feet, well they are little and they somehow keep me upright so I guess they're okay. The best part about my feet is that they almost never hurt!  I love that and I love that walking is easy for me and enjoyable.

11)My smile is good. My teeth are perfect. I paid good money to make sure they were and even though they are removable, I am happy when I see my smile. I smile a lot. Who cares if they're store bought, they never hurt, either!

My point? I can find something in every body part that is not optimal. Not perfect nor even kind of attractive, but all my body parts work. I can walk, talk, kiss, hug, hear, see and my innards all work well.  I am healthy and mobile. And you know something?  That's good enough.

I love to swim and I will put on a bathing suit and jump in the pool at every opportunity and never once will I care that I am no longer a bathing beauty. I did once have a pretty good body, but no more and that will never keep me out of a pool. I'm sorry other people have to look at my wrinkles and my sagginess, but not sorry enough to stay clothed!

Am I sexy? In my mind, not so much anymore, but in Roomy's mind, oh hell yeah! For an old broad, I guess I still got something he wants. Thank goodness!

This is the body I have and to be honest, I am so grateful that everything still works that I am not going to be ashamed or hide or worry about what anyone else thinks of how I dress or how I look. I am happy with who I am and I am happy with how I look and I wish every other woman I know would feel this freedom.

Yes, bashing your body is the WRONG WAY, PLEASE GO BACK!

Jo


17 comments:

  1. Jo what a timely post :) I don't like to see negativity when it comes to body image. If you're not happy with what you see in the mirror then make a choice to change what you know you can and accept that which you cannot change.

    Complaining about it never changes anything!! And I really don't get "self-hate".

    As you know 7 months ago today I decided to make some positive, healthy changes...and they're paying off. I'm working hard--not because I hate my body--but because I love myself enough to want to stick around...and some of my previous choices weren't going to afford me a long future. As of today I am -84lbs, -51 inches and I'm super pleased that my decision to start living healthy is paying off :)

    And as for you Jo-- I've never met you-- but I can tell you have a beautiful soul and that is really the part that matters. Happy to call you my friend!!

    Cheers, Jenn

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    1. I am so proud of you, Jenn. I know you've been working very hard and I also understand it's more about health and the nicer image is a bonus!
      Thank you for the sweet words and for always being so supportive. A girl needs friends like you and I'm really glad I have ya. ♥

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  2. That was a passion packed post Jo. I enjoyed taking the time to read it through.

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    1. Thank you, k~ . It tears me up to see and hear perfectly beautiful women talk about all their flaws as though a muffin top or unruly hair are disastrous things. If you want to loose some weight, diet and exercise. But do it for your health because perfection will elude you. Beauty will never really come from perfection, it comes from goodness.

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  3. It's nice when things work...no matter what they look like, haha!
    I've always been amazed that women, no matter how lovely I think they are, can find things about themselves that they don't like. Sometimes, those things are the things I like the most!

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    1. Yes, Lee. It's so often true. And as we age acceptance is just plain vital to our happiness, our confidence and our enjoyment of live itself.

      I say, be who you are and be that person better than you were yesterday!

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  4. oooo this is a great post Jo. Have you seen the disturbing video about this issue - It is funny and true - but disturbing.
    I was going to add the link here - but will just tag you on facebook instead. :)

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    1. Thank you, I will for sure go find it.
      It's a very serious and upsetting topic to me.

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  5. Imperfect at this age is the new perfect! Thank you for a timely, honest and loving post!
    Itty Bitty

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. I really do wish all women of all ages would embrace their bodies. Working parts are a good thing!
      Thanks,

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  6. I love, love, love this post. It definitely had to be written and I'm glad you chose to do it. With such a close call with my cancer I am so thankful to be here I don't even care what's saggin' or draggin'. If I hit the lotto I may bring a few things up but I will never mess with my laugh lines or tummy. No way. I have lived an awesome life and I can tell you a story about every scar, every bump, every wrinkle and I like it like that! As for hair. I'm just happy to have some now and a body that stays upright and functions as much as I need it to. - GREAT post!

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    1. You really get it! I'm pretty glad to have you around in any lumpy, wrinkly or saggy way! You're a beautiful woman and I'm proud to call you friend.

      Thank you, so much.

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  7. I sure have noticed as I get older that everything sags and drags. I just am not what I used to be and never really will be again. If I lose all the weight I will still have saggy baggy skin that will hang and probably look way worse than now...so at this point I am looking in the mirror and thinking I'm not half bad after all. After all I could look worse. It does suck to get older, but all those folks that looked so fine back in school are in the same boat...we are all older and sagging and bagging and that is a comfort. All that sucking made me giggle a bit Jo. LOL Great post!!

    Kathy
    http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com

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    1. YAY! I made the giggling trucker's wife giggle! Love it!

      We all age and we all have things that just aren't quite what we'd like, but that's what makes us US and I am so good with that!

      Thanks for always supporting this old scribe and for always having a kind word.
      You rock!

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  8. You have a great attitude towards aging that both women and men should adopt. Looks definitely aren't everything.

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    1. Doing the best you can with what you have and practicing good grooming habits should always be enough. Regardless of your age or sex.

      Thanks for stopping by, I've missed you!

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