Momma Has Gone Home

In this life you have parents, if you're lucky, who guide you, set examples for you and knock you into last week, when needed. I had that. I had a sister and brother who were older than me to learn from and I did that. I learned how to maneuver through my teens without getting grounded. I did that mostly by staying out of trouble. I may have been grounded a time or two, but I don't remember.
What I do remember is mostly good or funny things and I think that's just right.

My dad passed in 1978 at the age of 56 leaving Momma alone in a world where she had never been alone. She lived 45 minutes from her closest kids. She had never paid a bill. Never used a checkbook. Didn't know whom they owed what nor whether or not she had enough money to pay them. With a little guidance from her children she took it all on head first. The once completely dependent woman became Miss Independence and she remained that until just a few years ago. Five years ago she gave up driving and became dependent on Jo's Taxi. It was nice to spend time with her and help her meet her needs at the same time. It was rarely an inconvenience. Our lives have been closely intertwined for the last 5 years.  More closely than ever before.

On August 5, she left her beautiful and beloved apartment to take up residence with Roomy and I and her two grandpups. She did this willingly and was welcomed lovingly. Life was much better for us with her under our roof. She was eating better, drinking more water and being treated pretty much like a queen. For the most part, it was our pleasure to care for her. Stress happened, but it was never more important than her safety and happiness. She was happy. We were happy.

On September 9 at 2 am I was awakened by her calling my name. I reached her in seconds and saw her collapse on the hall floor just short of my bedroom doorway.  I bent to help her up. She did not assist me at all. She always helped get herself up. I sat on the floor holding her head and shoulders in my lap while Roomy called Life Alert. Before he finished giving them details, she took her last breath and I continued to hold, kiss and cry.  Momma had left for her reward knowing she was loved. Hearing my voice tell her so. Feeling wanted and part of this household, not a visitor. I am grateful for those moments. Momma began her journey to Dad from the loving arms of her baby.

I miss her already. But I carry no regrets. I loved her fully and for the most part, gave her the best I had. I am so filled with awe. The house didn't sell because she wasn't meant to go south. The house is off the market this week because we need to mourn. She was here with us because God sent her here to pass in love, not alone.

God bless her soul and Momma, thanks for being Momma.  Give Dad a big hug and lots of love from us. I know he's been waiting a long time for your arrival.

Jo