SHENANIGANS

My phone rang at 7 a.m. and I am getting ready to go to work. Grabbing the phone as I hustled to the kitchen for that last cup of coffee before I head out the door, I hear, "Mrs. Heroux?" 


"Yes."


"This is Sgt. Somebody from Westland P.D. calling. Is Jayne your daughter?"


My heart quickly rose to my throat. I was having difficulty finding my voice. What had happened to her. Why was her local PD calling me at 7 a.m.? It couldn't be good news. Dear God, please let her be all right.


"Yes." The only thing to leave my lips.


"Well, ma'am we're holding her and her boyfriend, Rob. Do you know him? I haven't been able to reach his contact."


"Yes, I know him. Why are you holding them?" 


Still not able to breathe well.


"They were picked up last night driving under the influence and your daughter doesn't have insurance on her vehicle and a number of other charges."


"Oh my God! Seriously? Are they being released?"


Okay, at this point I am relieved she isn't hurt or dead. I am glad she wasn't alone, I think. I want her out of that jail so I can, oh, I don't know what! She's an adult and I can't really do anything, but she will know how disappointed I am, that's for sure!


"What do you need from me? I mean, what does she need?"


"You'll have to come and sign her out because she can't drive an uninsured vehicle. It's in impound and she'll have to obtain insurance and show that to the impound officer and pay the storage fee."


I am now crying. I have to go to work in 5 minutes. I have no one to cover me until 10 and I don't want my little girl sitting in jail for 3 hours more! I am nearly an hour away from her.


"I'll be there as soon as I can, but it will be 11 or after, at best. Do I need to bring anything?"


"No. Just sign her out. I'll let her know you will be coming. Can you try to reach Rob's family for me? I'm not getting an answer and they thought you might drive by there?"


"I'll try to get them later. I have to go to work right now. Are we done?"


"Yes, ma'am we're done. Drive carefully now."


He hung up. I hung up.


I went to get my purse and shoes and some kleenex. I am now crying full out. What in the world was she thinking? Why in the world would she not have insurance? What was Rob thinking? How am I going to handle this?


The phone, again.


Growling, I answer. "Yes?"


It's my daughter,


"Mom?"


Still crying.  "Are you okay?"


"April Fools!!!"   Laughing hysterically on the other end of the phone from her and others in the back ground.  I am not amused.


"I am going to drive down there and beat your ass! You seriously thought this would be funny?"


"I did and I can't even believe you believed it for a minute!  And are you crying?"


Yelling a bit now, "Hell yes! I'm crying! My daughter is in jail an hour away and doesn't have car insurance!"


"I'm sorry, Momma.  Really, I thought it was funny and I still think it's funny, but I never meant for you to cry!  I love you, Momma!"


"I love you, too. Please don't ever do this to me again!  EVER!  No April Fools jokes on your momma ever, ever again."


There was more, but I think you get the gist.  In retrospect it was very funny and I see the humor now. That day, not so much.  


April Fools my ass!  Such shenanigans from a grown adult woman!  


Jo