Another holiday to celebrate with and for Momma. A day to gather her three children and their spouses, all 3 of whom she loves, with food, gifts and a lot of love. It's a day to honor the many years our momma has given us all she had to give. A day to remember a lot of days we have shared as a family under her wing. Memories of our childhood will be discussed and laughed about and plans for our summer reunion will be talked about with anticipation.
I have prepared some of Momma's favorite foods for our party because I know she loves when I do that. She always appreciates a home cooked meal and does very little cooking for herself. She still makes a mean pot of chili and some decent tuna and noodles, but she leaves most of the real cooking to me and she's happy to come join us for a meal. I love cooking for her.
We (Roomy and I) took her to the theater Thursday night to see a childhood friend of mine's granddaughter in a production. It was her first professional performance and she was amazing. Momma enjoyed the show and we did as well. On the way home she said, "That was a nice Mother's Day gift, thank you." I'm glad she enjoyed it and I'm extra glad we get to share good times like this with her.
I believe that Mother's Day will always be all about Momma as long as we have her. I will get to be THE mother on Mother's Day in due time. I am a daughter first. When my kids were little I used to think I'd enjoy being in my mother's position, being THE mother. I never thought I'd rather stay home on that day than be with my mom, but I did think I'd just take another day and call it MY Mother's Day. So I did. Then my brother started coming on Saturday from out of state to celebrate and we just made THAT day Momma's day. We all got together and had Mother's Day on Saturday and then Sunday was my day with my kids.
When Dad died, it became Mother's Day week-end. I couldn't stand for her to be alone on Mother's Day so we just started spending the whole week-end together. Sometimes my kids are busy and don't make the trip to see me on Sunday, so Momma and would go shopping or just hang out here and eat left-overs and maybe watch a movie or two. If it's nice outside we sit out there and talk and enjoy the day. If my boys come over, that's wonderful, but as the years pass, that's becoming very rare. I get phone calls from Tennessee and I love talking to everyone on that day and wishing happy Mother's Day to them as well. I miss them so much on holidays. I miss everything I used to love about the holidays. The only constant in my holidays is that Roomy and Momma will be part of them. Celebrating with them, cooking for them, laughing or just hanging out with them is what our holidays have become, for the most part. I miss my kids being here. I miss having a house full of grand babies on the holidays.
I have been thinking this over since Christmas. I think I am going to give my kids a new calendar with MY holidays marked in red.
Christmas will be the Friday after Thanksgiving. I would love to have the Tennessee kids here for that one so we could have a real family Christmas.
My birthday is fine, a call to remember me on that day is good enough.
Mother's Day will be the Sunday following the traditional one. Father's Day will be the Sunday following the official one. The gift I am going to ask each of them to give us is their families time at my home for a few hours. The other holidays are not a big deal to me, but those three, I really, really miss my family gatherings for those days. I would NOT expect the Tennessee families to be here for Mother's Day or Father's Day.
We also host a family reunion for my small family in July and my daughter and her family come for that and my son and his family come, the other two boys do not. I'd love for them to come. I'd like them to get better acquainted with my sister's family and my brother's and my mom would enjoy seeing them as well.
Raising independent children was a mistake. I'm sure of that now. They are wonderful people with successful lives, but they do not seem to need 'family' and I can't imagine that. They all think 'family' is under their own roof, mostly. That's good, but the extended family time creates so many memories for little ones. The grand babies barely know their cousins. I guess the rush around life style makes everyone want to just stay home on their days off. I get that. I really do. I wish they would all slow themselves down and find time for each other and for me. I know that sounds selfish, it is selfish and I think it's okay to want to be special to my kids a couple times a year. It's also okay if they don't agree. I'll enjoy this week-end with Momma and Roomy and Roomy will spoil us both. ♥
The world has changed so much in the last 20 or so years and I am just not sure I will ever understand all of it, but I do know that I am loved by all my kids and grand kids and really, what is more important than that? Absolutely nothing.
Happy Mother's Day!