THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE GBE #8 The best day of my life was the day I gave birth to my first child. She was a difficult pregnancy, but an amazingly easy birth. ONE pain and there she was. Oh wait, the best day in my life was when I gave life to my second child, my son. The first (and only, it turns out) boy in my side of the family. Lots of boys on Dad’s side. Or maybe it was when I met and very shortly after fell in love with Mike. My soul mate, 11 years my senior and nothing like any man I had been with before. He was, however, very much like my Dad. Dad passed at age 56 and I met Mike a few years later. I always wished they had known each other and now, well, I suspect they do. Heaven, I’m sure, is the great reunion spot. Ya know, it was the best day in my life when we married. I inherited his kids. That was pretty cool. Definitely the best day. Then again, the best day in my life happened when our first grandchild was born, and again when the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh and the eighth came along! OH and my daughter inherited 2 girls with her second marriage, our first granddaughter and bonus granddaughter have given us 3 great granddaughters, best days in my life. It was most assuredly the best day in my life when we finely got Momma moved to her new apartment 2 miles from our house. That was a dream, long time dreamed, come true. I think, and certainly at that time, each new fur baby adoption or actual birth, created the best day of my life. Now in retirement and alone, they are my life. One needing lots of special care and one just here to love me. Pup is elderly and needy, but doesn’t like me because I do all the needy stuff, sigh. Cat loves me and makes me laugh. Cat also checks on pup from time to time, I’m convinced he’s looking for his heartbeat. Who knows? I realize right now, right here…I have had far more BEST days than WORSE days and that this not-so-perfect life I’m living now, is still likely to hold at least ONE more BEST day before my time is up. Hope you're having a BEST day, right now.

GBE#5 Beauty is so BIG! Yes, I admire many things because they are pleasing to my eye. Or pleasing to my heart. Or pleasing to my ear. But to my MIND, BEAUTY is much deeper. It is the soul of any living thing that is not just existing, but living to spread joy. Living to find and share love. Living to make someone or something else in our shared world better.   Beauty of the soul is just there. I don't think we necessarily develop it or learn it. I think we CAN, but mostly I think it is inherent. It is built into the actual cells of our being. Goodness brings beauty every time. Kindness is the key to beauty.   One may be physically drop over, drop your pants, perfectly gorgeous and still not be a beauty. If the essence of their soul is centered on themselves or their own beauty or feelings of self-importance, beauty cannot thrive. It cannot grow. It cannot exist.   Some incredibly kind, generous, giving people are also blessed with amazingly good physical features that make them what we refer to as "beautiful on the inside as well as the outside" and I know a lot of those as do you most likely.   But I know far more normal, average looking folks who are so kind, loving, selfless and good natured that most everyone considers them the most beautiful people they know. I concur.   Have your say about beauty and I’ll enjoy reading it, but believe me, I'll never see BEAUTY as an outward attribute when standing alone.    

GBE#4 WHAT PROMPTED ME TO JOIN THIS GROUP ************************************************************************************************************** I didn't hesitate to sign up the minute I saw the offer. The Admins are experienced and I felt right at home from the get go! I've missed the blogging world. I have continued to write, but posted very few here on my blog page because I was writing most of it for my own brain dump. I shared a few articles on my page, but very few. I am really comfortable here. Really love that both members and non can click on and read my thoughts. I love having a prompt and then seeing how many different takes there will be on each one. I feel today like I have stepped back a bit into a life I loved. The blogging world gave me an anchor. I learned from reading and from others offering honest critisisms on my style, my wording...whatever. We can learn so much by reading each others work and the comments on our own work. Not to mention those who care enough to send ims with their critiques. So, I'm here because I feel like I belong here and that isn't true of many places in my life now. I still feel like a writer. I still feel it cleans my brain of rants and raves and even happy thoughts that just linger and clog my creativity. Writing releases my mind to be open and involved again. Thank you for giving us this platform again.

GBE #3. letter to 13 year old Jo Dear Jo, 1963 edition: I want you to remember just a few things as you move forward to highschool. 1) you really are enough, just as you are. 2) life will never be fair, but you must be. 3) tough times create tough girls. 4) live all your moments, good and bad in faith. That is it. If you live in those guidelines, you will be all you were made to be and no one can be more than that.b>

TIME

GBE#2 TIME. My one commodity of which i have plenty is, time. I am not a busy person nor to I want to be. when I have a project to do, I like having my own time line, an hour here and there or maybe a day or two of buckling down and gettin' 'er done. Either way, it's entirely up to me. Retirement took me awhile to get used to. I had always been a person who just had ti fill every weekend with chores that I didn't have time for during the work week. I'm not her anymore. I enjoy doing what I'm capable of doing to keep the homestead in good repair and clean. I very much enjoy doing so at my leisure because I live in Florida, east coast, and it's very hot here from April through November usually. so working slowly and taking a lot of breaks is necessary and makes the chore go better. Having explained allof that...I also love lounging. I'm a crossword, find a word, make a word, puzzle building computer girl. Computer games can fill my whole day and I'm good with that, sometimes. I also enjoy Bingo, cards with my tribe and an occassional dinner out with the ladies ofour community and friends. Time, I have plenty and it is one of the things I am most grateful to have, I don't have to work,not yet anyway. It could happen if prices donkt soon begin to level out.

Alone and lost in my loss

I lost my husband of 40 years in May of 2022. After 8 weeks of hospitalization and an emotional roller coaster of good news, not much improvement, looking good again...his kidneys finally just stopped and he began the process of leaving us with relief and peace. I could see that in his face. Felt it in the firmness with which he held my hand. When he could speak, he was loving and asking me to please let him go. I promised to do so when he was called home. Told him we would all be ok and would look after each other. Told him he could go in peace, because his work here was done. Told him I would miss him until we joined hands again. Hoping beyond measure that it would be sooner rather than later. I meant every word. I believed we would be okay, the kids, the grands and myself. None of us will ever really be okay again. His loss was much bigger than I allowed myself to believe. Bigger than any of us realized until it was real. The result of all of this is that I now want to pull back from everyone I love because I don't want to cause anyone else this kind of empty existence. This kind of pain. No purpose because my purpose is gone. No future because there is nothing left that I can do. The things I'd like to do, I can't possibly afford. The things I could do, I have no interest in really. So I fill my time by doing the household chores that we used to share, inside and out. I have to pay someone to do the things I'm not physically capable of doing. I spend a few hours three times a week with my Gal pals, my tribe, playing cards and bingo. I have a cat and a dog that take up a good deal of time. The cat, good and fun time and he is my joy. The dog, senior with multiple special needs and I am not one of his needs. He hates human touch unless he is in a strange place, not our home, then he loves me to hold him and stroke him. Otherwise, he uses all his strenth to push and pull and try to escape my hold on him. I'm always afraid I'll lose my grip and he will fall to his death. Seriously, I am very aware of this possibility because he wiggles and contorts and if he did fall, it would likely cause him to break his neck. He is only 6# of Chihauhua, but he's as strong as any labrador when he needs to escape. So far, 3 years of this,we are both still ok. I love the little mess, but he prefers being alone. This is far from the life I ever wanted or imagined. I hope every day that I dont have to be here many more. I'm ready to go Home and be with my love, my family and friends that have gone before. Life here is now far too empty for me. I know my departure date is set, I'm just hoping it isn't a long way down the road. I am a strong believer and therefore, feel I must have some pupose here that I have not fulfilled. I pray to see that purpose sooner than later so that I may get busy completing my assignment.

GRIEF at 5 months

Today is the five month mark since my husband of 40 years passed and I have been left to learn. Learn what, you might ask. Who I am, now. What I am here to finish. Why I am so lost. Where I should be heading and choices to be made. I'm quite unsure who I am. I am a mother, but my children are grown and living hours away so not much mothering is needed or apparently wanted. However, I can and I am mothering my furbabies. So I've learned I can still do that, although alone is different, its doable. ✔ I believe we stay in this life until we finish our tasks. What mine might be is somewhat of a mystery to me, but I am willing to keep looking for things. It might be a thing or a long list or anything in between. I suppose I will be directed in any case. So I pray I will heed the call.✔️ The feeling of being lost is not new to me, but it is different this time. I was very lost for a short time after we lost Momma. I don't know where or how to find myself. I don't know where to begin. I am comfortable in this home. I am happy in my close friends and aquaintances here in Holiday Village. I belong here, I know. It's more a matter of where in this spot do I fit? I did invite a small group to dinner one time and it was a lot of laughs and a great meal. Yet no one has extended another invitation. I am really not sure at all what i can do to fix this except be patient and keep attending group events, which I have been doing. Time, I suppose.✔ Now where my life goes from here is my biggest question. Some days I just want to be home with the furkids and not even think about anything or anyone else. Then I feel very content, however, I dont want that to be my life. Thats why I attend any group gathering that I can and I enjoy doing that, but always wonder if I fit there anymore. Always. ✔ Last on my list is that my friend, adopted sister, is in another state and ill. She is with her kids and their kids and their kids and her husband is there now, too. I can't go for two reasons. My furkids need to be cared for and that isn't cheap and I am going to spend Thanksgiving with my kids and their kids and I will be paying for furbaby care for that trip. So financially speaking, I can only do one trip and it has to be my kids. We will keep in touch by phone and she knows I love her and am with her in spirit and heart.✔ All in all, I am doing okay, day to day. I get through each day with a fair share of laughter and still tears, at some point. Tears for missing my partner and hugger. Every day I have to say "my" something instead of "our" something. Small thing, I suppose, but still painful. "My" was never in the plans.✔ Pictures...something I am so thankful to have.✔

Grief at 4 months…

My life changed on May 15, 2022 in every conceivable way. My husband, life mate, partner in everything went home to be with our Lord. Eight weeks prior I had days that I feared I was losing him and then days I thought I'd be bringing him home. Never sure under what conditions that homecoming would occur, but still optimistic. Mostly I prayed for His will be done and for us to have the strength and wisdom to adjust to whatever that looked like. I never believed, and still dont, that I should pray for his healing. I believe the book of life is already completed and all things happen as He means for them to happen. So I ask for strength and wisdom and ability to accept. I received a most peaceful feeling for days after he left me; wrapped in the Grace of God, no doubt. I was relieved that his pain was over. That he was at peace and surrounded by so many lost loved ones that we shared. I was jealous. I do not believe I get to choose my last day on earth, but to be honest, I did tell God, "my bags are packed and I'm ready when you call me." I am sitting here now, wondering why I am still here. Really! I mean, my reason for everything I did for the last 40 years, besides being Momma's back-up for anything she needed, is gone. Yes, I have amazing kids and friends and my furbabies, but they have all survived our loss and basically are doing okay. Their lives have not changed except they miss him. They always will, as I will. As I still, 8 years later, miss Momma. They are not, however, living alone. Every day, alone at days begining and ending. People in between to pass time. To laugh with and be normal. That is great, really great. These people are my saving graces. Nothing in my daily life is really right anymore. It's all very different and though not horrible, it's not right. I'm not right. I'm unstable, at best. I feel like my only comfort is found alone at what is now, "my" home. Comfort, but also a deep sense of loss. Loss of the life I loved. The "key" to that life, it seems, wasn't the community, the friends, the weather...we thought it was. The "key" was "US" and this "house" which we made our own. That's what made my life so good. That is gone. It's now my house and my life. I have to find a way for all of this to be right, to be normal. I adopted a kitten, just short of a year old, he turned one in August. I still have special needs, psychotic Beary who doesnt like me particularly, but does need the care I give him. They are very good for me and I'm very happy to have them in my home. I would be lost without my furbabies, for sure. So thank you Lord for leading me to those decisions at the time. I love my babies. My future? I only know that I will do what needs to be done, one way or the other. I will continue to move forward, as best I can and I will continue to try to make Mike proud of my progress moving on with what time I have left. I will continue to try to be a kinder person every day. I will try to be less self-concerned and more about those I might be able to help in some way. That is pretty much where I am four months into my grieving process.

I have been on this earth 69 1/2 yrs. and I've finally decided the following:
I love my body.
Yes, it's softer than it was, but my arms still hug my loved ones with the same warmth and satisfaction as when I didn't have so many true loved ones.
My legs are dimply and wrinkly, but I can still walk where I want to be.
My face looks like the map of Greece, but it's me and in that face I see my momma and a bit of my dad. I see the pain I've survived in the wrinkles and the love I've known in the laugh lines. My face shows my life has not been easy, but I'm here and I like who I've grown to be.
My stomach is not hard and my abs have gone into retirement. That tummy stretched out to 52" to house my babies and somehow went back to semi-acceptable size now 50 years later. I'm ok with that.
My feet are healthy and anxious to do my biding.
My eyes have never been perfect, but post-cataract surgery, 20/20 distance and reading glasses power 2 are the best I've ever had! I SEE beauty all around. I also see evil. I know the difference.
I am blessed to be half way through my 70th year and still,
of relatively sound mind.
That last one may be debatable, I'll give you that one.
Age is a number. Mine is big and therefore, my herstory is full of having lived. It's a wonderful thing.

There was a time, not long ago, that I thought I was a nice person. I thought of others before myself. I knew I was a giver and a fixer, by nature. It was always difficult for me to be the receiver, even though I was in need and did accept help from time to time.  It was never easy, appreciated, but not comfortable. Somehow, those years formed a strong need to help when and where I could and allow the recipient to feel good about letting me do so.

Im not that person now. I'm sorry that I lost her. She was loved and she had friends, lots of them. There were very few around her that didn't speak kindly of her.

That isn't true now. The person I've become is not concerned with being nice.

I do have wonderful friends. People I love and care about and enjoy. But I also have people around me now that don't like me. That call me bossy, mean and accuse me of ruining everything since I moved here.  Other people thank me for trying to improve and listen to the membership. Thank me for thinking outside the box. I understand that's life when you're in a leadership role. What I don't understand is gossiping behind one's back and smiling to one's face. The membership did grow under my leadership because I had much help from members. People just waiting to be included, invited to assist or take charge of something.

Having said all of that, I finally resigned and now see, hear and feel a very heavy weight from those who cheered my leaving the volunteer position that they told me no one wanted. I know why now. It's very hard to be disliked, disrespected and to continue to try to mend the split community. Reaching out and not trusting the hand reaching back. Knowing those relationships are superficial. Knowing I am not the nice and honest to a fault person that I used to be. I don't belong anywhere any more. I don't even know if I like me anymore.  I wonder how my friends have been able to embrace me. I wonder why they would want to do that.

Bullying. I am talking about adult bullying from behind your back. While you think it's a few people, with which you can deal, you learn they've spread their opinion of you as fact to many others. Those others believe them. They don't know. Yep, it's jr high school at the retirement village and I'm the target 🎯.

Veteran's Day 2017

VETERAN’S DAY 2017 ~ Presented to Holiday Village Veterans

“I (State your name), do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic, that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservations or purpose of evasion; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States, and the Officers appointed over me according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice so help me God.”

I know that you all still honor this oath and will until the day you die. I am humbled by that alone.

As we walk through our lives as free Americans, it’s important to remember all who gave a portion of their lives to our country. Those who signed the blank check for their own daily freedoms to become property of the United States of America for a specified period of time. Let’s not forget that the same check included their own lives. Those we honor today did NOT give their lives, but they gave years of living free to ensure that we all could do exactly that. They were in strict control of their military branch and followed and lead others in the commands of their officers and the Commander in Chief. How do you thank someone for that?

I suggest we begin by recognizing that sacrifice of the years given for our freedom and the families who waited for these Veterans to return, alive or not. All are worthy of our thanks and our continued respect. 

Today, I’d ask each of us to shake a hand, buy a cup of coffee, lunch, a beer or simply say thank you for your service. It isn’t much, but many of our Veterans have never personally been thanked. It’s way over due and honestly, even if they were thanked daily, would it be enough? 

I write words I choose and no one says I can’t say this or I can’t say that because each of these Veterans protected my right to speak my mind and publish those thoughts. No-one will tell me I can’t say something because the government wouldn’t approve. Because of these people the government doesn’t have to like my words. You don’t have to worry about what you say or to whom. Freedom of speech is something we take for granted, but if our military hadn’t gone to war to protect us time and time again, imagine who and what we might be as a country today. Our news certainly wouldn’t be what it is today. Thank you one and all who served, who sacrificed and who made our country stronger and safer. And continue to do that today.

You are each special and valued to those of us who gave nothing. We are all humbled by your existence. 

I know that some of you, most of you, were drafted into service, but you went. You served. You made us proud then and still do. You didn’t duck out of your obligation. You wore the uniform with pride and now you wear your history with the same pride and will always be a Marine, a Soldier, a Sailor, an Airman or a Guardsman.

I salute you from my heart and I thank you…each of you…for your excellence and your bravery. I thank God for returning you home to your loved ones and also to us.

God bless the USA and her Veterans.

Jo Heroux

11-11-2017

Guns~Control or Complete Freedom to Possess

Las Vegas...after trying to come to terms with my emotions of three (yes, three) hurricanes that hit our citizens and devastated islands we called paradise, aren't we all just overwhelmed? Emotionally and maybe physically, as well, out of gas.

Would a more compassionate and more uniting leader have made any difference? Who knows, we don't have that option. 

But today I am hearing and thinking about gun control, again.

For the umpteenth time in the past few years we are talking about why we have so many more gun deaths than any other civilized country. The only difference seems to be that we have comparatively fewer restrictions and a cultural love of the all mighty gun. And it can be all mighty because the only defense of a gun wielder is another gun wielder. So why do we have this love of the gun? Why don't other countries? 

Why does every gun discussion come down to hunters and home defense?

For me...I was raised in a house with some guns. I was married many years ago to a hunter who owned a few guns. I never liked them. I shot a gun a couple times. I didn't like it. Having said that, I didn't care if they were in my home as long as they were safely stored and used appropriately. They were.

Today however, I do not want one in my home and I do care if anyone who wants one can buy one legally. I do care that many people do not safely store guns in homes where toddlers and teenagers alike could, and now and then do, kill themselves or siblings or friends with one which was stored unloaded and high away where they were thought to be safe. 

I have watched experiments on TV with kids of all ages "finding" a planted gun to see what they will do. Every time the kid will pick up that gun! Sometimes while saying they shouldn't touch it and they need to tell someone. They WILL pick it up. You cannot trust any child of any age to be in close proximity to a gun and not touch it.

I have no issue with hunters owning hunting guns. Give them a background check, put them through a training coarse, nationally register them and their guns, and renew those registrations annually or at least every two years. Just like your car. You can't drive without a training session, a license and a renewable registration.

Handguns are okay, too. Training, background checks and nationally registered with renewals...sure.

I would love to see limits on how many you can own. Like animals, you have to prove you have the right situation to own a bazillion animals. You'll lose them to rescues if you don't. You have to be inspected now and then for these situations and they don't kill people.

I agree that we have a gun culture in the United States, but I'm not sure why except that the NRA created it and our hunters loved it. Guns for guns sake...collectors...sure, but really, how many are there? And how much of this culture developed because Obama was going to confiscate everyone's guns? Or so said the NRA. Again, background, training, registration.

My boys all have guns and think I'm crazy and a flaming liberal. They are entitled to their beliefs. I am entitled to mine.The biggest difference is that my wishes might save a few hundred lives in the next few years and their's will only save them having to get background checks, training courses and registration. It will not change anything else. 

Gun shows? No. Gun stores? Yes. Internet sales? No.

I've never proposed people shouldn't be allowed to own guns. I propose that some people should not have guns and that often we could sort them out BEFORE they kill a group of innocent humans for sport or out of pure hate for someone or something they perceive.

I don't think all shooters are mentally ill. I think many are hare filled for a variety of reasons. I think our liberal gun laws allow them to fully execute their barbaric killing sprees. Remember none of the shooters used illegally purchased guns. That is an important factor.

So...it's a hot topic today. It's been a hot topic before. It'll likely be no topic in a few weeks because Americans have short attention spans. Congress has no interest even though two of them have been shot, seriously wounded with permanent injuries by legally obtained guns in the hands of haters with no value for human life, including their own, apparently.

I guess I just don't understand...empathy is non-existent in much of my country. The ability to be in someone else's pain is beyond the grasp of too many Americans. It just can't always be about "me" at the cost of innocent lives. Can it?

Back to that leadership question above. Maybe if we had that empathetic leader who could see the pain, feel the pain these shooters cause, maybe it might help sway Congress to act on our best interest, once. To find a compromise that would sit well with both sides can't be that difficult. Can it?


Jo

MOTHER’S DAY 2017

Dear Momma,

This is the third Mother’s Day without you. It should be easier. It should be a day of me celebrating my own motherhood. I am a very blessed mom and raised some incredible humans whom I adore and I know they love and respect me in return. We have a good relationship and I am grateful daily for that. I feel much of that is because I had such a wonderful relationship with you. They learned, perhaps, watching us. 

I will not be with my babies again this year. I will not be in Michigan where I could go to the cemetery and sit by your stone and talk. I will be here with Roomy and our friends and most likely it will again be a painful day. We are going to breakfast at one of favorite ocean eateries, Crabby Joe's, with a group of friends. Few of our friends here have their children nearby. We are not the oddballs here, by any definition. We are living among our peers. My support comes from those who have been without longer than I have. They assure me it gets less odd. Less painful is what I’m hoping for. I am not expecting that for many years, I still miss you and can’t imagine that ever going away.

I do want you to know, I am sure you do, that I feel so blessed to have had you holding me up for nearly 65 years of my life. I know what a gift that was. Losing Dad at such a young age was so difficult, but we had each other from that day. Not the same. But something. I’m not feeling sorry for myself because my parents are both gone. I’m feeling loved because I had them. These particular parents were chosen for me. I am me because they raised me. That’s what I am thinking now. That’s how I deal. Gratitude filtered with heartache. Such great love is paid for with great sorrow. I would change nothing, except maybe to have been able to share Florida with you.

The family lunches on the deck are history. The Sunday’s with you, Roomy and I just hanging out are history. They are both wonderful memories and make me smile to recall. I’ll be doing that Sunday.  Maybe it’s time to change the guest list, but maybe host that cook-out lunch again. 

Anyway Momma, just wanted you to know that I still love you with all that I am and that I am still missing you every minute of my life. Florida would have made you so happy and I think of that every morning while my coffee is brewing, wishing I was brewing two cups.  Happy Heavenly Mother’s Day and please give Dad a hug for me.  ~ Jo

Spring In Holiday Village

Our Home 

We've been in this little piece of Paradise now for 15 months.

WOW! Where has this time gone.

Our life here is slow and easy most days. We have flowers and new palm trees to care for, well, Roomy does most of that. We have a few activities that we enjoy and are looking for new ones to start here with our newish friends and neighbors. It's just a good life.

Our closest neighbors, two of them, leave for the summer and the rest of our street dwellers

stay as do we, for most or all of the summer. 

The Social Club stops activities in April. And starts up again in October. I am thinking of trying to keep things going at least a once a month pool party with shuffleboard or cards or something this year.  

We will be in Michigan for the month of July, of course, and I am planning to attend my 50th High School Reunion. Not sure why we are doing this 40 years early, but okay. I'll play along.

I have also started doing the Newsletter for the Community here and think it will help in a few different ways. One way is that I am meeting and getting to know more people because I am trying to collect info to report. The other is that because it's a monthly publication, maybe more people will want to joint in or even suggest new or different activities. Communication hasn't been good here and lots of times things are posted in the mail collection area and that's it. The sign out front will say what is coming this week, but no details, of course. So for new people it's hard to know what some things involve and whether or not inexperience is a problem or whether late joiners would be welcome. So I'm working to clear things up a bit and hoping to encourage more participation next year.

No remodeling plans for this year! Just enjoying what we have and where we are.

Can't believe sometimes that we live so close to the ocean and that it likely will never snow here.

It's our dream come true, no regrets.

Jo

Serenity ~ Peace

Is the world different today? Is it just me? Does accepting facts comes harder as you age or easier? Letting things go isn't impossible. I've been doing for many years. The Serenity Prayer is my mantra. I live it daily, say it multiple times some days. I DO attempt to change the things I can. I DO accept the things I cannot change and I always ask for wisdom to know the difference. 

Maybe that last part is my hangup right now. Maybe I still think I can change my world. Not the entire thing, but my part of it? Maybe I still believe if I am kinder, less intrusive and more inclusive and make real effort to help someone through something, it will change the world. It will make a difference. Maybe I'm right. Maybe not. 

Does it really matter if I am a nice person? Does it really matter that I did a random act of kindness? It does matter to the people to whom I am nice, I guess, rather than being rude or just ignoring them. Although, maybe their life would be completely the same regardless of my attempts. Does it matter?

Ever thought about how you affect people you genuinely care about? I'm sure you could write a book about how people you love have made your life better, but what would they say about you? How much would their lives change if you just went away? Not died, just went away. Something to consider. Since our move to Florida, I've given this a great deal of thought. If not for FB, I'm sure I would be completely out of touch with many people I used to see or talk with regularly. People I thought would always be important to me. 

On another note...

I feel like many people that I admire are so excited about our new  

President and all he will change and improve while I am fearful of his views on things important to my life and also fearful of some of his choices for cabinet members, DeVos?, yet praying he will lead us upward rather than backward. I am praying his support system has compassion, which he seems to lack; they will have morals, which he also seems to lack. I am praying that I am wrong about so many things concerning him and also trying to accept the things I cannot change. Possibly we actually elected Ivanka and husband and they could have a better platform than the one we are seeing.

Accepting doesn't mean agreeing, it means understanding I cannot remove Trump/Pence from their leadership positions. I am not capable of getting Bernie Sanders in that spot and this is fact. Accepted. Have the wisdom to know the difference. Got that. Now I guess I need to pray for strength to accept my own truth. 

On a daily basis I still try to show kindness where I can. I try to lend a hand where I see or know of a need. I donate to causes I believe need my money to do good for our world. All these are things that show you part of who I am. The other parts of me are not so peaceful and not so tolerant and not so kind. Those parts of me are afraid and I am almost cowering away from what might be my reality. Our future is so much in question right now and I sincerely need peace in my heart. I also pray for that. 

I will continue to pray for the Lord to lead DJT/Pence in the way of the light and best interest of our country. I pray for intelligence to be the word of the day over unprecedented. Presidential is really nothing more than dignity and following protocol. Protocol that has real reasons for being set as the norm. Yes, norm would good, too.

Share your thoughts, if you'd like! As you can see here, my head is full of conflicting and confusing and frightening things. Maybe you have just the message I and many of my friends need to hear.

God bless America.

Jo

New Year 2017

It's fun to wonder what a new year might bring. It's also scary to realize as we age that not everything another trip around the sun brings is going to be awesome. Some things are better left unknown and even unexplored mentally.

Will we be better off on this day next year? Will we be just as healthy? Will we be together? Which of our friends will still be considered part of our life, not just part of our history? Who will we meet this year that will become irreplaceable in our lives?

A new President with a Congress of his party, well, kind of the same party. Not giving DJT a pass on being a Republican, exactly. Most of his ideas are just basically thoughts with no plan to actually implement, but that could change. Or so I am told by his supporters. I can't disagree because his very platform has changed considerably both during and post campaign. Since the election he has softened or adjusted his priorities. Much more middle of the road than the ideas that got the MAGA (make America great again) members excited and drew their votes. But no one seems to care because they won. 

Personally, I plan to just live my life right here in my little corner of the world and try really hard to stay above the water line of financial drowning and maybe even save a little more now that remodeling is over. 

I'm again, going to work on being kinder and less disagreeable. I'm going to work on just taking care of my own business more and other's less. I still hope to be able to lend a hand or two when needed, but just do so without adding my thoughts. Hope my head doesn't explode!

Down the road we go and lucky for us that we are still able to do so. Moving along with reasonable health and mental stability is a gift at this point. I plan to remember that more each year.

Wishing each of you, my friends and readers, a bright and shiny new year in which to grow and prosper and become the best you.

Look out 2017, cuz we are coming to conquer!

Jo

AS THIS YEAR DRAWS TO A CLOSE…

Looking back…

We have been in this house a year and 3 weeks. Wow. How is that possible? 

Our Michigan home

We left Michigan in January 2015 and headed to Ormond Beach and our new home and life. So much was left behind so that we could begin to build the life we had talked about nearly 30 years. A home in a warm climate with no real winter. A place where we could walk outside all year long in relative comfort. Where flowers bloom and grass is greenish all year. The ocean being 3 miles away was a bonus. A wonderful and amazing bonus.

The perfect Florida house

The house we loved was a cozy and beautiful home. We loved everything about that house. It was a typical Florida home with stucco and painted white with a lime green trim all around. The inside was three bedrooms and two baths, a Florida room, living, kitchen and dinette and a fabulous 14 x 39 foot screen porch all across the back with a lovely wooded view. It had fan windows in three rooms, which I loved. It was exactly what we dreamed of.

Within a few months we realized although the house was perfect and we did love it, it was not the neighborhood we needed. We needed friends. We had neighbors who spoke and waved,, but weren't interested in being more. No socialization with one exception. A single gal with two adorable pups who became and remain our Florida family. So glad we met and even gladder that we are still friends and within walking distance yet.

We put our perfect house on the market in August and started looking for our new community. The decision was quickly made that we would go to a 55 and older manufactured home community. Now, which one. There are many here in this general area.  

Located directly north and adjacent to our subdivision was the one we chose. We were going to move a few blocks by foot and a mile or so by car since no road connects the two communities.

The exact house would be determined by what was available when our home sold, which I believed would be soon because, well, it’s perfect.

It sold in October and we closed on Dec. 4 and moved into our new manufactured home on Dec. 4, 2015.

Our forever home (?)

Let me say here that I do not recommend moving twice in one year. It’s not fun. It’s not exciting. It’s not a new adventure. It is, however, exhausting and downsizing a THIRD time in a year is emotionally more than one should attempt.  

Leaving Michigan, we sold and gave away nearly half of our furniture. We moved the three bedrooms we would need and all of Momma’s furniture, our dining table and chairs and our recliners and a couch. We moved all of our end tables to sort here if they weren't all needed.

We got rid of nearly everything from the kitchen and baths that wasn’t going to be needed. Sorted towels by matching ability to new house and tossed or gave away the rest. Tossed, sold  or donated about four comforters with matching sheets etc because I didn’t want to use the limited storage for such things which could be replaced, if needed later. Kitchen utensils…from Momma’s house and ours were divided and cut to what I thought was bare essentials. Knick  Knacks were only moved if they held sentimental value to me. Momma was gone just two months and some things could not be left or given. Some things were needed even if they were not to leave a box once the move was completed. 

Downsizing again 8 months later…really tough. Lots of tears. The couches both had to go. Wouldn't work here. The recliners, wouldn’t work here. One, Momma’s recliner was coming and her wooden rockers, two, were coming. We bought a new couch and chair for this living room.

Tables…we had Momma’s on the porch and ours in the dining room.  Momma’s wouldn't fit here, we needed round. Ours came. Two beds came, Momma’s stayed in the house for new owners daughter. This kind of made me happy and sad all at once. 

Tossing, donating until we had everything here that we needed and what we couldn’t easily store, eventually, got donated, sold or tossed. It simply had to be done. It was draining. 

Other than the couch and chair, we bought virtually no furniture for this house until I figured out a way to fit in some shelves for photo albums. I cannot let go of those.

So here we are a year later…in this year we have made new friends and joined many social activities here at the park. We have some truly lovely people around us and we love this house. We put in a brand new kitchen and guest bath and new flooring in the guest room, bath and kitchen. We would still like to put new flooring in the living and bedroom, but nothing urgent.

We added on to our very small back porch and it is now a beautiful 12 x 20 and we practically live out here. We added vinyl windows so the cooler temps don’t send us inside anymore. It’s the best thing we could possibly have done here. This is our forever home, we hope.

We have made two trips back to Michigan this year. We will be spending July there each year as long as we are able to do so. We have a small travel trailer that we store and then park at Holiday Shores. We have time to visit with everyone who wants to make time for us and all the family did so this year; we hope they will again next year. It’s the perfect set up for us and Miggy.

(Oh, Miggy…our beloved Jake, the rat terrier of our hearts for 15.5 years, passed away in September and we adopted a Chihuahua/rat terrier from the humane society. He chose us right away and has held our hearts every since. Miguel Jose Heroux turned three, we think, on Sept 30 this year and we are so very blessed with this crazy puppy love.)

baby Miggy

And while all of this seems overwhelming…okay, it kind of was…it was all worth it. We had our typical Florida house, now we have our forever house, maybe. One never knows what He has in mind for one’s future so I’m keeping my options open.

New porch, tree, Miggy, Brie and Bella with us

Happy New Year all. Peace and love to all and my dear Lord, please keep a hand on our new President’s mouth and a whisper in his ear from time to time. Guide him to a most successful term, for all of our sakes.

Jo

Veteran's Day 2016

PAYING TRIBUTE TO MY HEROES.

Annually I write something about the brave, selfless women and men who enlisted, or were drafted into, the military and then served their time for us. For us to be who we want to be, here in this country of diversity. For us who have done nothing to protect our shores from invasion or attack.

I write these articles because it is what I am able to do to show, not only how much I appreciate their time, service, their dedication and sacrifice, but also to remind others to show respect. Reminding my fellow Americans to do something that makes a Vet's life a little better or easier. Remind us all to say the thank you that might stay inside our head when seeing a Veteran going about their everyday life. Maybe go ahead and buy that cup of coffee or lunch or dinner, if you have the means to do so. Maybe just walk a few steps out of your way and extend your hand. A smile and mouthing the words "thank you" from a distance, yeah, that works, too.

I think about how much these Vets have given us and how honored they all say they were to be part of their military arm and how much better their branch is than the other branches and I am humbled. Always humbled. 

Do you understand that they have given themselves, body and soul, to our government for the service years? Do you know that once a soldier, sailor, marine, coast guard or air force, ALWAYS being that? It is a life long membership. They deserve to never be in need again. They deserve medical care, the best available, for life. They deserve to never go hungry or homeless. We, American citizenry, have to do better. 

Maybe President-Elect Trump will be able to make strides in this area. Maybe he will do what we've mostly wanted and mostly failed to provide. I pray for that.

So my friends, my enemies and you strangers out there...please take some time today and beyond to  do what you personally can do to show respect, gratitude and honor to the women and men who have served you so proudly and so honorably. We cannot hope to actually equal what they've given us.

May this day find all Veterans a show of support and gratitude for all you have given and continue to contribute to America, our country owes you so much more than we are giving. I hope this continues to get better as we focus on your needs.

Submitted with my highest respect and most humble gratitude,
Jo

It's Over~Day 2 of President-elect Trump

The election is over. The decision of America is in. Well, the decision of the populous was Hillary, by 300,000 votes, but the electoral, the legal decision is Donald J. Trump by a large margin. Looking at the map, it's very, very red with blue tiny accents. Done deal. It does again open the door to how we make the electoral college really reflect the voters choice. Or possibly amending the constitution to dissolve this antiquated method of vote counting. It won't be the first time in recent history that much talk persists and likely little action will follow. We are a slow country to change anything constitutionally connected. That's a good thing, I believe.

As a pantsuit supporter I was dismayed and maybe more shocked to see all the Red. I was not happy. I was, and remain, concerned about our national security and our image around the world. The future is never obvious, even when we think it is, but in this case, it's just a blur. 

Will President Trump be the man who spoke so perfectly giving his acceptance speech? Will he be the focused and dedicated man the office requires? Will he see that working with Congress is not always easy, but necessary? Will he understand being President isn't a Dictatorship? Will he use those great negotiating skills he's bragged about to get things done or will he try to bully his way through? Will the almost humble man who met with President Obama today, be our new President?

So many more questions. No answers. Only time will tell.

I want him to do well. I want him to govern with dignity, which I now have seen he can show. I want him to lead this country forward not backward. I want better healthcare for all. I want college that's affordable to all who work hard and want it. I want a strong military and I want great support from our generals from whom Trump can learn. I want our country to be safe for immigrants, for LGBT, for blacks, for hispanics and for everyone! I pray this man will embrace these things and do all he is capable of to achieve these goals. I also want financial balance. I believe he can achieve this, if he applies himself. I hope he does.

So I am convinced today, as I am supporting with all my power of prayer, our new President, that his need to succeed and his need to be the best, he will be a good and maybe even a great, the greatest President we've ever had. In his own mind, if not the world. I'm hoping it's the world, though.

Praying for the USA...join me?

Jo

MY FAVORITE VETERAN 2016

Hi Baby Boy,

Yep still. Never gonna change. I gave you life and you are always going to be my baby boy. I couldn't be prouder to say so. You are a man most mothers would never stop talking about, lucky for you I am just such a mom. I'm sure my friends all think you probably have a halo, you don't, but it's okay if they think you do.

This day is always so very special for me for so many reasons and this year as the past two years, I am a bit weepy remembering how much Grama talked about you and worried about you while you were serving. Remembering the trip she and I made to watch you graduate on this very day in 1970. Orlando felt so far away until we arrived and saw that taller, older, so mature young man walk toward us, unrecognized by us, I will add here. When you smiled and we knew you, it was awe inspiring. Unbelievable. Our mutual pride had to be visible. That kid we had sent off two months earlier was indeed a man. I can still see you sitting with us over lunch and pressing the crease in your uniform pants as you spoke. 

A man well on his way to becoming a motivated and capable man of honor.

Today, I am so thankful your time in service wasn't more traumatic than it was. And it was traumatic enough. Your time was filled also with some exciting travel and experiences that you would likely never have had, otherwise. Who gets to hang out in Japan for a year? Who gets to visit Hawaii on the government's dime? I'm grateful you had some good experiences and even more grateful that your "Gulf" time wasn't worse. 

I am so proud of you today and I am still so thankful that you served your country with such honor. I love you.

The Navy part of your history is such a huge part of your today and I can't thank them or you enough.

Walk tall and walk proudly, my handsome son, with all the gratitude I possess.  I am truly a proud Navy Mom.

😍